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A weekly newsletter delivering sibling loss specific grief resources, support and validation, coping strategies, sibling loss stories, news from The Broken Pack, and much more- including exclusive content and opportunities for subscribers. |
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Hello, Reader! A robin, an elephant, a tiger, an a wolf… This has the making of some bad joke or a the beginning of a children’s story. But, it is not. Rather these are the very Images I have been connecting with my brother through this week. I am out of town, attending the 44th annual conference for the Association for Death Education and Counseling® (ADEC) in Columbus, Ohio. In a glorious 32-room independent bookstore I visited while here The Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling nearly leapt into my hands with it’s bright orange cover and green foiled fierce line drawn tiger. The mascot for my and brother’s school was a tiger and for most of the years it was almost identically to the one on this book. Tony (my brother not the cereal loving mascot) loved that school, the mascot, and a shirt with the tiger he wore so much. I remember seeing the original Disney film as a child with Tony but didn’t recall much about the story. When I opened the book and saw the name of character, Father Wolf, I started to recall some of the story. I bought it of course and will read the book, but that connection with Tony was palpable. The next day, in a session a book with an elephant, one of my favorite animals and with which I am obsessed, and a tiger was on a table. I’ll leave the story of the robin for another day but suffice it to say with my brother’s humor and mine, a particular robin has reminded me of him since his death. This zoo of animals is serving as a continuing bond to my brother, his guidance strength, and humor. A robin, an elephant, a tiger, an a wolf… This has the making of some bad joke or a the beginning of a children’s story. But, it is not. Rather these are the very Images I have been connecting with my brother through this week. I am out of town, attending the 44th annual conference for the Association for Death Education and Counseling® (ADEC) in Columbus, Ohio.
In a glorious 32-room independent bookstore I visited while here The Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling nearly leapt into my hands with it’s bright orange cover and green foiled fierce line drawn tiger. The mascot for my and brother’s school was a tiger and for most of the years it was almost identically to the one on this book. Tony (my brother not the cereal loving mascot) loved that school, the mascot, and a shirt with the tiger he wore so much. I remember seeing the original Disney film as a child with Tony but didn’t recall much about the story. When I opened the book and saw the name of character, Father Wolf, I started to recall some of the story. I bought it of course and will read the book, but that connection with Tony was palpable. The next day, in a session a book with an elephant, one of my favorite animals and with which I am obsessed, and a tiger was on a table.
I
’ll leave the story of the robin for another day but suffice it to say with my brother’s humor and mine, a particular robin has reminded me of him since his death.
This zoo of animals is serving as a continuing bond to my brother, his guidance strength, and humor.
Continuing bonds is the name for the relationship we continue to have with our deceased loved one.
A few key points on continuing bonds :
-Not all continuing bonds are positive relationships- just like not all relationships with the living are.
-It does not make you crazy to have an ongoing relationship with the deceased.
-Your continuing bond may be different than others with their loved ones or from others with your same loved one. That is okay.
-Just like relationships with the living, these relationships can change over time.
Some ideas to explore your continuing bonds will be explored in next week’s issue.
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Warmly, Angela |
